Hey guys, I've been thinking bout death off and on for the past few weeks and decided to pen my thoughts, in a manner of speaking, here. Feel free to add your thoughts on the subject and whatever... I feel like having a good discussion bout something meaningful.

Well as I've already said, been thinking bout death and trying to decide my take on the whole religion afterlife thing. I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness so I have an understanding of the bible (but please don't judge me on that, it's how I was brought up and had no choice in the matter, now I do I see things differently). If I ever did decide to get religious I would become a Jehovah's Witness but that is a very big IF, because most of it makes sense but there are a lot of big issues that I have with the religion as a whole.

For one, I don't want to become like my mother in the sense that she discriminates against my friends and me for not believing the same thing she does. I feel that is totally wrong, it goes against what her bible says and I think we have the right to our own opinions...

Anywho I've gone off topic... (I tend to do that a lot). I know death is inevitable, everyone dies eventually, its just a matter of when exactly, so I'm not afraid of death or the ending of my life (though I'm not suicidal and wouldn't welcome death with open arms or anything). I wonder sometimes what everyone would do if I all of a sudden died. Would my family and friends be devastated and unable to continue their lives as before? Would some people just shrug their shoulders and say "meh, its sad but not tragic"? Would they think I was all I could be? Will someone wish it was them and not me?

I don't know the answers to these questions but I do know that if I did die, I'd be glad (so to speak, I believe you can't feel things after death and that you're conscious of nothing) that I did and not one of them, in a purely selfish manner. The reason for this being quite simple, "The one who cries is the one that is left behind..."

I know it's hard to be left behind so to speak, and therefore I would really hate it if one of my family or friends died, not because it means their life has ended or the actual dying but because they're not with me anymore, because they'd now be unreachable.
As I said, purely selfish. I would grieve the hole they left behind, not they're leaving... That probably makes me sound like a horrible person but I'm being honest, and I guess that's all that anyone can ask of me.

Well anyways, I've waffled on enough, please share your thoughts on the matter and feel free to criticize me in any which way you like